Highs and Lows

It's been a weird couple of days.

Firstly Steph had a panic attack about going off to another town to do work experience. I hardly slept on Sunday night worrying about her and trying to come up with ways to make it easier for her. In the end I decided that I can't keep rescuing her (no matter how much I want to) and assured her she could do it, she would be fine. Well, she was fine. Her work experience week has so far exceded any expectations or hopes I may have had. She is callling me at night full of news and things she has learned, and there is joy in her voice. Such an amazing answer to prayer.

That has been my highlight of the week.

Now for the downside. I am really struggling at work. I'm forgetting things that I don't normally forget, making mistakes that I don't normally make. My brain just seems to be foggy. Thats the best way I can explain it. There is also the pressure of having 5 bosses, who are all related to each other (family business) and who all think that the demand they have made on me is the only thing I have to do at that time. I have one boss telling me to not pass on information to another (because he tends to over react and gets things out of proportion), one boss only giving me half an explanation and then getting angry when I misunderstand him, and one who is just so stressed it's really hard being in the same building as him. They all expect me to be able to cope with anything they throw at me, and cope immediately. And I can understand this, because in the past I have coped. But at the moment it's all just beyond me, and I have no clue why.

I'm worried about the farm, but that's nothing new, I'm worried about Steph, which is also normal, I'm worried about finances, probably a bit more than normal but still, nothing I haven't been able to handle in the past. I'm just feeling a bit like the wheels are about to fall off.

Lord, please help me at work. I'm feeling under more pressure than usual and not feeling able to cope with it. Please give me the tools to be able to meet the expectations of my bosses, or if this is no longer the place for me show me a new direction.

I leave my finances at your feet Lord, I'm feeling out of control in that area and that really scares me. Thank you Lord for the milder weather we have enjoyed this week. I pray for that final soaking rain to see our crops through til harvest.

Thank you Lord for answering my prayers regarding Stephanie. She is really enjoying her time with the Naturopath and finding some independence she didn't think she was capable of. It's such a blessing to me to hear such joy and excitement in her voice, thank you.