Sunday

I'm in two minds about Sunday. I never have to work (well, not the kind that you get paid for), I get to go to church where I can worship my Lord amoung people who genuinely like me (still struggling to get my head around that sometimes), I get to sleep in.

But Sunday has a down side too. Sometimes there is conflict on Sunday because I push too hard to "encourage" (that would be nag, bribe, threaten) my kids to come to church with me. In the past Fisherman has actively opposed me going, although this I'm pleased to say hasn't happened in quite some time now (thankyou Lord). Sometimes I still feel jealous, then guilty, then jealous again of those sitting in church with their husbands and children by their side. Someone pointed out to me the other day (0r was that week?) that I may be mistaking this envy for a longing, but no, I'm pretty sure it's envy. And I get so mad at myself for it.

Then there is Sunday afternoon. I come home, all refreshed and looking forward to spending some time with the Lord in prayer and his word to be greeted with a mountain of washing, dirty dishes and an empty house. Sigh. So I do the dishes while listening to praise music, which helps make it not such a chore, and I'm working my way through the washing. I can't put my finger on it, but I'm feeling a bit discontented with my lot, which is yet another thing to feel guilty about.

I think the bottom line here is that I'm tired. Stuff bothers me when I'm tired. And the prospect of another busy week at work followed by Saturday at sport, followed by Sunday at church and then home to do that housework again isn't exactly filling me with joy. And it should shouldn't it. There are plenty of people who would give anything to lead the blessed life that I am complaining about.

So, I'm thinking it's time I sat down with a cuppa and spent some time with the Lord. Which means that I have to get off the computer....but rest assured I will be back!

Dear Lord, help me to find contentment in the life I have and not dwell on the negatives. I am so blessed to have a wonderful family and dear friends and for that I am grateful Lord. Help me find peace as I spend some quiet time in your word this afternoon, help me to hear and understand any message you have for me.