Light Bulb Moment

Something our speaker said on Sunday really struck a chord with me.

He read from Ezekiel 22:30. Standing in the gap.

And I had a light bulb moment. It dawned on me. God doesn't expect me to lead my family to him, or help him convert them (as if he needs any help). My job is to stand in the gap for them.

So that is what I shall do.

Didn't take me long to work that out. How lucky are we that we have a patient and loving God, who loves us no matter how many times we reject him, or disappoint him, or hurt him.

Lord, Thank you for loving me, and thank you for continually forgiving me when I fail. Please watch over my family. Thank you for loving them even though they may not be ready to accept your love yet.

Good News

Hello!

Yes... I am still here.

Thanks for your gentle prodding friends. I feel as though I'm finding some sort of balance in my life although it doesn't seem to be getting any less busy!

I went back to church last week and worship led for the first time without Melissa. It was ok. Actually it was better than ok. It was awesome to be back singing for the joy of the Lord. I actually had to stop singing during "Amazing Love" (Chris Tomlin's version) as I was getting a bit choked up. Luckily it's a really well known song so the congregation didn't need my singing to lead them. They do a fantastic job on their own.

There were a couple of "light bulb" moments for me during the service and the healing process has started. How lucky are we that our Lord waits patiently for us to come home every time we drift away?

In other news... I now have a stressed out student in her senior year of high school! At the moment she is a very focused and studious student. Praying that can continue. Steph is continuing with singing and guitar lessons this year and today had her first private sewing/pattern drafting/designing lesson. She loved it loved it loved it. So all is well in her world at the moment. (Thank you Lord.)

Scott is in his second year of high school which is traditionally the worst. The year where they try to figure out who they are, where they fit and how far they can push their luck. It's only February and so far Scott has been banned from the computer twice and had his phone confiscated for two weeks. Goes without saying he is pushing his luck! (Thank you Lord for granting me with patience to deal with this, please help me out with the right words to say and the right discipline when necessary.)

We are almost ready to harvest our first batch of honey! Yay! Steph has designed cute labels, I have ordered jars, and Kym will start extracting the honey when the jars arrive. All very exciting. I promise there will be photos.

So there you go... I haven't dropped off the face of the earth. I just needed a gentle nudge from wonderful friends.

Love to you all and God Bless.
Sharon.

Drifting...

I know I've already posted today... but I've spent some time reading through the wonderful blogs on my sidebar and I feel prompted to come clean.

All is not well on my faith journey. All is not well with me.

I feel quite seperated from the Lord at the moment. I know how to fix this. But I don't do it. I haven't picked up my bible since early December. I haven't been to church since then either. I am dreading going to church this year. I don't really have any rational reason why, I just don't want to go.

We will be one family short this year. And that is playing on my mind. Melissa is our pianist (we have others, but Melissa is the main one) and I just don't want to worship lead without her. I have had some wonderful times practising with her, choosing songs, planning services.

Church will still be church. And God will still be there which I know in my head is the most important thing. But I still don't want to go.

Australia Day

I love a sunburnt country
A land of sweeping plains
Of rugged mountain ranges
Of droughts and flooding rains
I love her clear horizon
I love her jewel sea
Her beauty and her terror
The wide brown land for me.

That's an excerpt from Dorothea McKellar's "My Country". I have loved that poem from the moment I first read it as a child. It pretty much sums up how I feel about this great place we live in.

That's not to say that I don't want to experience other places of the world. I would love to travel one day, but finances are a bit of an issue there, so that dream may have to wait.

First of all there is plenty of this country that I am yet to see. Our ten year plan includes a trip around Australia (we will be taking Boris of course!) once the kids are settled after they finish school. It's something that I'm really starting to look forward to. There is so much on offer in this great big brown country and I can't wait to see it.

Happy Australia Day!

So this is what 40 looks like.

A bit frayed around the edges I'm afraid! Here am I all dressed up and ready for my 40th birthday party. The theme was Hawaiian, I don't generally get around wearing hibiscus flowers for the fun of it! The sash I'm wearing was a gift - it says "40 and naughty". Which I am not!! Much. Well not all the time anyway.

So.... 40. Well, I don't feel any different. Although on close scrutiny I look like I'm in need of a good nights sleep, and perhaps a face lift

I thought it might be fun to come up with 40 things I'd like to achieve in my 40th year.

1. SLOW DOWN. Take some time out to spend with myself and my Lord
2. Lose some weight. Don't want to be "fat and forty"
3. Commit to prayer time every day
4. Start working on my (dead) garden.
5. Read a good book
6. Take the kids to the movies
7. Take a break with my wonderful husband (a good year to do that, 20th wedding anniversary in April)
8. Stop working so much overtime.
9. Quit netball - for good this time.
10. Help Steph with her studies and her time management.
11. Help me with my time management!
12. Ask for a payrise.
13. Pray daily
14. Finish a jigsaw puzzle
15. Have a facial
16. Learn to quilt (might need your help Joanie!!)
17. Pay off that darn credit card
18. Stop using that darn credit card
19. Buy some new shoes - not sensible ones!
20. Be happy with my lot in life....

Ok, maybe 40 was a bit ambitious.

Happiness is offering who you are to the world and knowing it's enough....

Have a fabulous year everyone, whether it's your 40th, 80th, or 1st.

Moving On

I have just returned home from a farewell party for some very dear friends of mine.

It was pretty low key and relaxed and I was quite proud of myself for keeping the waterworks in check.

I'm a bit surprised with how I have reacted to the impending move of a family that I consider to be amoung my very best friends.

I've been angry at them, happy for them, sad for them, jealous of them and then back to angry at them. I'm happy that things seem to be falling into place for them after a time of uncertainty. Sad that their move has been forced upon them by a combination of drought, economic downturn and sad that we are losing another farming family from our community. Jealous that I don't get to go too. I've often dreamt of a sea change, or a tree change, or just a change. And I'm more than a little angry that they are leaving me. I mean how dare they.

It's not the end of the world. They aren't leaving the country, not even leaving the state. They will be about 5 hours drive away, which is a pretty long way to call in for a cuppa, but still within reach.

All in all the farewell went well. It was a lovely, relaxed get together where we all had the opportunity to show that we love them and value them. I held it all together until it was time to go. They leave very soon, and not knowing if I would catch up with Craig again (I will have numerous coffee's with Melissa) before they leave I made a point of saying goodbye. He hugged me and told me he loved me (I replied, yeah, well I hate you) and he said he knows, and he's sorry, but it's not like we'll never see each other again. And he's right. We will see them again. But it won't be the same. They won't be just down the road.

It's not fair.

I know this is a new and exciting chapter in their lives. They will be fine. We will be fine.

But it's still not fair.

Lord, please be with Craig and Melissa and their children as they make the final preparations for their move. Please watch over their decisions and help them work together to help and support one another. Keep them in our hearts and minds as they make this huge change in their lives. Most of all be with them and let them feel your love and keep them safe.

Attitude Adjustment

I think I've come up with my new years resolution.... a little late I know, but being on time isn't my new years resolution!

I've decided to try really hard (with the Lords help of course) to change my attitude toward life. I've had a bit of a "poor me" thing happening of late. And this three weeks off has done wonders toward giving me a little more perspective.

I am incredibly blessed to have a good job which pays well, a loving healthy family both at home and at church and most importantly a God who loves me.

So I'm going to try to be a bit more thankful.

If any of you catch me complaining again feel free to let me know I'm doing it!

2010 is the year for counting my blessings.