Let Down

I'm feeling really flat this morning. I'm not entirely sure why but for some reason I feel overwhelmed and close to tears. Like it's not going to take much to send me over the edge.

Stephanie's facebook status this morning is gleefully telling the world that it's 48 days until she moves to Adelaide. I'm thinking that could have something to do with it.

I'm also feeling the downside of having a daughter who shares everything with you. There are some things I just don't really want to know. She has been talking to a new boy (guess I should call him a man, they are all adults now...SIGH...) I could tell she really liked him by the way that she talked about him and how MUCH she talked about him. I think it was fair to assume the feeling was mutual since he rang her every day twice a day. They live 200km apart so up until yesterday they had only really spoken via text and phone. She has met him but as a friend of a friend.

She spent the day with him yesterday and came away feeling a bit dissappointed. She gets the feeling that he isn't over his ex girlfriend and isn't sure she wants to get involved for fear of getting hurt. But I can tell she really likes him. So now she is waiting for the phone to ring. And not really sure what she should do or what he wants to do.

Now if I had a NORMAL teenager I would be blissfully unaware that any of this is happening! Because on the surface she is business as usual. And to be honest I'm really not sure why it's affected me this way. Steph has had breakups and disappointments before but it's never got me down too much. Perhaps it's that coupled with the knowledge that she is leaving, and next year I will be unaware of what she is thinking and feeling because she won't physically be here.

I don't know. All I can say is that I'm not feeling particularly Merry this Christmas eve....

Lord, please watch over Stephanie. Guide her thoughts and her actions. Guide this young man also, encourage him to do the right thing and not leave her hanging and let her know where she stands. Please watch over her when she leaves home. Give her the strength and the confidence and the commitment she needs to fulfill her dreams and help her to be everthything you made her to be.